Post-Holiday Random Thoughts

Happy New Year, comrades! Let's get random, shall we?

Evidence of the influence of pop culture in my life: when watching a movie that contained the phrase "nooks and crannies", the first thing I thought of was Thomas' English Muffins.

My Christmas tree is still up. I worked hard this year, scratching the crap out of my arms searching for the broken bulb that made a foot-tall chunk near the top of the tree go on strike. That fucker's staying up. I might just take off all but the red and white ornaments and call it a Valentine's tree.

Thank God for electric start snowblowers.

The tsunami and its aftermath are so horrifying. It's heartening to see people across the world band together and send help to these poor people. Then I see Hotel Rwanda and am reminded that people do terrible things to other people for no real reason, and other people won't step in to do anything unless there's something in it for them. There's no political repercussions from helping the victims of a natural disaster. (thank God, otherwise the tsunami victims would probably be shit out of luck as well)

I see VH1, in an effort to squeeze the last weary drop from the ratings boon started by "I Love the 80's", are putting out "I Love the 90's - Part Deux." Ok seriously, isn't it a little soon to be reminiscing about the 90's - again? (Ok ok ok, the footage of Bush the Elder puking on the Prime Minister of Japan always gets me giggling, but come on. This is the decade of "Who Let the Dogs Out", Lorena Bobbitt taking the "money" and running, the Macarena, and Al Gore doing the Macarena - badly.) What's next - "I Heart the 00's - We're Just Makin' Shit Up Now and Look Who's Still Watching"?

February 9, 2005 marks the Chinese New Year and the Year of the Rooster. Which yes, can also be thought of as the Year of the Cock. I'll let you giggle over that one a bit.

Status Check on Shitkicking-Grinning, Moronic, Asswipe Douchebag in the White House - yep! Still there! Which reminds me, I need to go stock up on hard liquor.

Someday I want to interview a technician who gives Brazilian bikini waxes and ask what their very worst client experience was. I'm envisioning something along the lines of flatulence triggered by flinching when the naughtybits hair is forcibly ripped out.

I just confirmed through the magic of Tivo that Resident Evil: Apocalypse contains a scene of Milla Jovovich leaping off a building wearing what can best be described as a white assless-chaps vinyl leotard. Surprisingly, this still is not enough to make me want to see this movie.

Is there anyone keeping track of how many dirty old men have bought "Girls Gone Wild" - and seen their own daughters on it?

Today I was in the kitchen while my baby kitty Molly was poking around my feet. I moved my foot suddenly and she jumped so high that in her arc of descent her butt was pointed straight at the ceiling. I probably took a whole kitty-year or two off her life but man, sometimes I just can't help laughing at the misfortune of others.

Ok that's it for now. Stay tuned for more. Someday. Or not. Who knows?

D