Monday, February 20, 2006

Just When I Thought I Saw All the Stupid in the World

So I'm leaving Target, and I see this woman park her pickup truck. She gets out of the truck and she's yarping on her cell phone as her daughters get out the other side. Great, so she was talking on her cell and driving with young children in the car. THEN, she starts to waltz toward the store - without even bothering to shut the door of the truck since she was STILL yapping on the phone. Her daughters had to call her back to shut her door. I'm so tired of all the dumbass in the world.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

What Dreams May Come

So last night I dreamt that I was going to be deported. How that is possible and to where I would be deported, I don't know, seeing as how I was born in this country, but in the regime of George W. Bush my subconscious probably figured anything was possible. So I'm being deported, and a guy I haven't seen since I graduated college agreed to marry me to keep INS off my ass. He then proceeds to get pissy at me for taking him for granted. This is a marriage of convenience, I say, there IS NOTHING to take for granted. He sulks and indicates he wants the marriage to be a real marriage. I wake up. I don't know why these dreams happen to me.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Teddy Bears and Dick Cheney: The Evils of Stuffed Soulless Objects

So, Dick Cheney shot someone.

Other than that, things haven't been too exciting with me. Took my cousin shopping on Saturday and then over to meet my good Indian friends for dinner. Their kids are getting so big - makes me feel all the older.

I was in Target on Friday buying toys for said kiddies, and pondering which Pocket Polly sets to get for the little girls, when I hear a woman and her daughter behind me, apparently looking for a gift for another child. The little girl suggested a stuffed animal, and her mom positively SNAPPED something along the lines of "Don't be ridiculous. What if (the kid) has some kind of allergies? I don't know any mother that would appreciate that kind of present."

Am I seriously that behind the times that I just don't know about stuffed animals being considered as weapons of mass inflammation? What happened to getting nice squishy teddy bears as a gift? I freaking loved those things. When did stuffed animals become sinister and harmful? (And Teddy Ruxpin doesn't count.) Am I the only one who is horrified by the woman's reaction? I think what further rubbed me the wrong way is that, ok maybe stuffed animals are the work of Satan, but you don't have to respond to your child like s/he is a mentally impaired menace to society. I wish I weren't reminded so often that people suck.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

My Super Bowl Commentary

This won't be lengthy as I have no stake in Super Bowl XL, just a few comments.

I don't really care who wins, but I do like Jerome Bettis, and Matt Hasselbeck is the brother-in-law of Elizabeth Hasselbeck, one of those vapid biddies who hosts The View on ABC. Not only can I not tolerate anyone who will work with Star Jones, but this particular vapid biddy spoke at the 2004 Republican National Convention. So I'm going to lean towards the Steelers.

What was with people booing Tom Brady for the coin toss? Sure I'm glad that for once in a bozillion years that the Patriots aren't in the Super Bowl, but come on, there's no need to boo the guy. It's not like he's Randy Moss.

Al Michaels = cheesedick.

Rolling Stones for the halftime show = safe choice, somewhat boring, better than Britney Spears wearing a sock on her arm or Janet Jackson Boobgate every single day of the year. I guess you gotta credit them dried-up pieces of leather for their sheer stamina to keep on keepin' on.

September 24, 2006 - the New Orleans Saints will be back in the Superdome!!! Whoohoooo!!!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

My Weekend - Sushi, Chatty Cathies, and Getting Molested by a 2 yr old

So, the summary for this weekend.

My cousin has been itching to see the sights in downtown Chicago, so I finally had a weekend with enough time to devote the day to take her down there. We got on the train and hopped over to the Sears Tower. I don't think I'd been to the Skydeck in at least 20 years if not more. My cousin was properly shocked and awed by the view from there. It was a bit too cloudy to see really far, but we got to see enough. We're peering out at the Hancock and Navy Pier, when I feel tiny fingers on my inner thigh. Whaaa??? I look down for the owner of the fingers, get a little 2 yr old girl by the hand and say "I'm not your mom, hon!" She looks up at me, completely unfazed, lets go of my hand and goes to burrow in the correct set of legs ( I assume.) I wasn't even wearing the same color pants as her mother.

Skygaping done, we went over to have lunch at Cheesecake Factory at the bottom of the Hancock, which my cousin also loved, and then did some shopping at Water Tower. My cousin actually ran into a girl there who was her best friend during kindergarten in Korea. The girl's living in Chicago now studying English. How crazy is that? Cuzz nearly had a heart attack.

Then, my aunt insisted that my cousin buy my mom a birthday present, which is no easy task. Mom is the worst person in the world to buy presents for. Anyone who thinks I'm the worst person to buy for should meet my freaking mom. Not only do clothes and jewelry not work for her, but she is one of 7 women in the world who has no interest in bath and body stuff or candles. Knitting or crocheting stuff for her in the last year has been my saving grace. We ended up not getting anything for her at WT, but came back home and checked out the local mall, where we got a bamboo plant in a ceramic dragon dish, and this (Japanese?) teeny tiny wooden scene thing encased in glass. Or something.

On the way back home on the Metra, my cousin and I were seized with private giggling and sympathy at the plight of a woman across the aisle, who had gotten caught in the throes of an Overly Friendly Talker. This poor little woman had gotten stuck in the same seats as a gentleman who would. not. shut. up. The beleaguered woman had to get on her cell phone to get a break from him. And when her call regrettably ended, of course the man just started talking again. I informed cousin that this is why she can't come to Chicago alone on the train. She was properly put off the idea for good. Evidently in Korea, Overly Friendly Talkers are non-existent, so she's quite startled when strangers talk to her at all.

Sunday was Mom's birthday, so I took my cousin and the p's over to Todai Seafood Buffet in Schaumburg which means all you can eat sushi. Gooooooood stuff. Sushi is really just an excuse for me to eat wasabi. Mom loved the lace scarf that I made her and the gifts from my cousin, plus the carrot cake that we made for her turned out pretty freaking yum. I'm getting old as I am just freaking exhausted right now. Trying to stay awake and knit and peek alternately at the Super Bowl and the 2nd Annual Animal Planet Puppy Bowl. I don't really get the purpose of the Puppy Bowl - it seems to be 3 straight hours of watching puppies play. But I can think of a lot worse ways to spend my time than watching puppies.

I'm putting paid to this post and inviting one of my kitties to sit on my lap instead of this machine. Toodles.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

And You Thought America Was Repressed

So, I've been learning a few things about life in Korea from my new roomie, my cousin. One of the major things is that Koreans are VERY appearance-conscious. LK may make fun of me for having seen me in sneakers only once, but I'm a Price Mart piece of trash compared to the importance that Koreans seem to place on their images.

Women are extremely conscious of their weight - fat women are very rare in Korea. Men are also conscious of their weight although maybe not to the exact same extent. Plastic surgery is more common in Korea than in America. (although if the average American could afford it I'd be interested to see where the rates would skyrocket to - Pluto, or only Uranus. Hee hee, Uranus.) And Koreans LOVE their designer brand names. Ralph Lauren, Tommy Hilfiger, if it's an overpaid American designer, they want to wear it and wear them logos LARGE.

So this leads into tonight, when my cousin and I were watching Project Runway on Bravo, which we both love. It's really interesting to see what kinds of designs the contestants come up with, and of course any reality tv is a fine study in train wreck sociology. I made the comment that I would marry one of the men working for the show (he seems to be the majordomo of the show, Tim Gunn, for those of you who watch.) even though he may be gay. My cousin was quite surprised to find out that a large percentage of the men on the show were in fact gay. She's also been exposed to Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, which seems to have given her the impression that there are a LOT of gay men in America. She commented that she didn't think there were many gay men at all in Korea. I said "or maybe there are, but they just haven't told anyone." Because let's face it, where there are people, there are heterosexuals and homosexuals. Whether or not they can speak about it, and consequently how much their presence is recognized, is largely defined by their culture and environment. And I think it's likely that in Korea, people just don't speak about homosexuality much. Granted, my cousin is only 20, and I had encountered a lot less gay people at 20 than I have by the ripe old age of 34. But I very much doubt that she will encounter too many openly gay Korean men, just because it seems like the appearance-conscious culture over there is not amenable to them.

But honestly, where do they think they are getting all their beloved designer brand name clothes from? Straight men??? Have they SEEN the way straight men dress????